Friday, January 22, 2010

Mono-phonic Thinking


Another one from Dr. N. [This is the first one. And its hilarious!]

After examining a case of suspected infectious mononucleosis, Dr. N and the student on call were discussing the diagnosis and management.

Dr.N: "The heterophile test might not always be positive in the early course of the disease.. So, what other test can you use for diagnosis?"

Student: "Give the patient amoxicillin. And watch if he develops a rash.."

(This one cracked me up. Believe me, it might sound like me, but I wasn't the student here!)

Friday, January 15, 2010

Test-imony


Here's a true story I heard the other day from Dr. N while I was ordering labs for what looked like a girl with a sexually transmitted disease.
Dr. N is a Pediatrician, practicing in a small town in USA.

[Writing the anecdote in her words.]

I was working in the clinic one day, when I saw a 8 year old girl with urinary problems. I ordered labs on her. When her labs came back, I was shocked to see Trichomonas in he urine. Now, with a STD in such a young child, it automatically becomes a case of child-abuse. I had to call the Child Protection Services. But before I did that, I had to inform the mother, and try to find out the culprit. This woman was a single mom.

Dr. N: "Mrs. So&So, does the child go to stay with her father sometimes?"

Mrs. So&So: "She's doesn't stay with him. Why she hasn't met him in a while"

Dr. N: "Do you have a boyfriend?"

Mrs. So&So: "Not really, why?"

Dr. N: "Well we did some tests on her, and her lab results show that she has trichomoniasis, a STD. We suspect that your child is being sexually abused, and so I'm going to call the CPS."

Mrs. So&So: " No it can't be.. "

Dr. N: "Well, her urine culture results are right there.."

Mrs. So&So: "Ohh.. then she doesn't have the disease.."
*goes crimson red*

Dr. N: "Wha..??"

Mrs. So&So: "Well, yesterday when I took her for giving the specimen, I took her to the restroom. I waited and waited and waited... but she wouldn't pee. So I just took some of my own pee, and sent it.."

Dr. N: "Well in that case, I suggest you set up an appointment with *your* doctor as soon as possible! You have a STD!"




Similar Stories

Blog Widget by LinkWithin