Saturday, March 22, 2008

M is for Medicine :D

Some interesting Med-Quotes, that I came across. *Tho most of them are 'doc-bashers', take 'em with a pinch of salt...*

Enjoy!! :D :D

Don't think of organ donations as giving up part of yourself to keep a total stranger alive. It's really a total stranger giving up almost all of themselves to keep part of you alive. ~Author Unknown

Our profession is the only one which works unceasingly to annihilate itself. ~Martin H. Fischer

Men are not going to embrace eugenics. They are going to embrace the first likely, trim-figured girl with limpid eyes and flashing teeth who comes along, in spite of the fact that her germ plasm is probably reeking with hypertension, cancer, haemophilia, colour blindness, hay fever, epilepsy, and amyotrophic lateral sclerosis. ~Logan Clendening

The only weapon with which the unconscious patient can immediately retaliate upon the incompetent surgeon is hemorrhage. ~William Stewart Halsted

The public blabbers about preventative medicine, but will neither appreciate nor pay for it. You get paid for what you cure. ~Martin H. Fischer

Doctors are just the same as lawyers; the only difference is that lawyers merely rob you, whereas doctors rob you and kill you, too. ~Anton Chekhov, Ivanov

The fact that your patient gets well does not prove that your diagnosis was correct. ~Samuel J. Meltzer

Patients may recover in spite of drugs or because of them. ~J.H. GaddumHe's the best physician that knows the worthlessness of the most medicines. ~Benjamin Franklin

A drug is that substance which, when injected into a rat, will produce a scientific report. ~Author Unknown

The doctor is often more to be feared than the disease. ~French Proverb

You may know the intractability of a disease by its long list of remedies. ~Alonzo Clark

When you no longer know what headache, heartache, or stomachache means without cistern punctures, electrocardiograms and six x-ray plates, you are slipping. ~Martin H. Fischer

It is easy to get a thousand prescriptions but hard to get one single remedy. ~Chinese Proverb

Never forget that it is not a pneumonia, but a pneumonic man who is your patient. ~William Withey Gull

The patient does not care about your science; what he wants to know is, can you cure him? ~Martin H. Fischer

Medicine is the only profession that labours incessantly to destroy the reason for its own existence. ~James Bryce, 1914

Medicines heals doubts as well as diseases. ~Karl Marx


Btw: I've now become an ardent fan of Martin H. Fischer !! :D

Have-A-Happy-Period. ;D ;D

This is an actual letter from an Austin woman sent to American company Proctor and Gamble regarding their feminine products. She really gets rolling after the first paragraph. It's PC Magazine's 2007 editors' choice for best webmail-award-winning letter.


Dear Mr. Thatcher,

I have been a loyal user of your 'Always' maxi pads for
over 20 years and I appreciate many of their features. Why, without the
LeakGuard Core or Dri-Weave absorbency, I'd probably never go horseback
riding or salsa dancing, and I 'd certainly steer clear of running up
and down the beach in tight, white shorts. But my favorite feature has to be your
revolutionary Flexi-Wings. Kudos on being the only company
smart enough to realize how crucial it is that maxi pads be aerodynamic. I can't tell you how safe and secure I feel each month knowing there's a little F-16 in my pants.

Have you ever had a menstrual period, Mr. Thatcher? Ever suffered from the curse'? I'm guessing you haven't. Well, my time of the month is starting right now. As I type, I can already feel hormonal forces violently surging through my body. Just a few minutes from now,
my body will adjust and I'll be transformed into what my husband likes to call 'an inbred hillbilly with knife skills.' Isn't the human body amazing?

As Brand Manager in the Feminine-Hygiene Division, you've no doubt seen quite a bit of research on what exactly happens during your customers monthly visits from 'Aunt Flo'. Therefore, you must know about the bloating, puffiness, and cramping we endure, and about our intense mood swings, crying, jags, and out-of-control behavior. You surely realize
it's a tough time for most women. In fact, only last week, my friend Jennifer fought the violent urge to shove her boyfriend's testicles into a George Foreman Grill just because he told her he thought Grey's Anatomy was written by drunken chimps.

The point is, sir, you of all people must realize that America is just crawling with homicidal maniacs in Capri pants... Which brings me to the reason for my letter. Last month, while in the throes of cramping so painful I wanted to reach inside my body and yank out my uterus, I opened an Always maxi-pad, and there, printed on the adhesive
backing, were these words: 'Have a Happy Period.'

Are you fu*ing kidding me? What I mean is, does any part of your tiny middle-manager brain really think happiness - actual smiling, laughing happiness is possible during a menstrual period? Did anything mentioned above sound the least bit pleasurable? Well, did it, James?
FYI, unless you're some kind of sick S&M freak, there will never be anything 'happy' about a day in which you have to jack yourself up on Asprin and Kahlua and lock yourself in your house just so you don't march down to the local Walgreen's armed with a hunting rifle and a sketchy plan to end your life in a blaze of glory.

For the love of God, pull your head out, man! If you just have to slap a moronic message on a maxi pad, wouldn't it make more sense to say something that's actually pertinent, like 'Put down the Hammer' or 'Vehicular Manslaughter is Wrong', or are you just picking on us?

Sir, please inform your Accounting Department that, effective immediately, there will be an $8 drop in monthly profits, for I have chosen to take my maxi-pad business elsewhere. And though I will certainly miss your Flex-Wings, I will not for one minute miss your brand of condescending

And that's a promise I will keep. Always.


Wendi Aarons

Austin , TX


PS:This applies to the context of another company marketing sanitary pads in India, with the same tag-line *ring a bell, yet??* :D :D

BTW: Here's the link to the blog:


Friday, March 21, 2008

My Verry Happy Birthday.... :)

My birthday this year was something special &kind of a brain racking experience… with a whole trail of clues laid down for me to crack, to find my gifts of course!! These guys.. (ref: D,Ank,Avi,Atul,Navy,Ravi,Kaushik,Ritz,Sattu & Saurabh…).. had a full day treasure hunt planned out for me!
Well, I’d been itching to narrate the story to Shruti or one of the others, when y’day Shruti pointed out that I could put it up on the blog. Bright idea!! & here I am writing an account of the day…

So, after the midnight party on the terrace, we all were in my room, when my series of surprises began! There was this ABSOLUTELY YUMMY pudding, thanks to chef Divya et al.

Then there was also this nice card with my Piscean qualities.. :) While we were talking and all, Ritz asked me to turn on bluetooth on my cell. I complied, thinking she must be sending in some sort of birthday graphic. As the message transfer ended, Ritu announced that the job was done, & if anyone wanted to give any instructions, they could do so. Okay. Now I was confused.. what was going on?? As, I saw the message, I realized it was some sort of a riddle that I had to solve, coz it was a music clip titled

"Clue 1":
As I listened to the song, I was told that this was a clue to find my first gift.. & I had to find it before the song ended!!! It took me some time to grasp what was going on, but as I listened to the song, it dawned on me! I ran to %@^$#!% ‘s room..!! & voila, there it was a b’ful rose lying on the bed!! But there was a catch… the next clue was lying next to it!

Clue #2:
This one was a riddle (ala HP).. Here’s how it went :
“Arjun ne dekhi the macchli ki aankh,
Tujhe dekhna hai mendak ka dil..”
Well, sounds tacky…doesn’t it?? But it’s a very well framed riddle…. There were a million things that I could think of, which were frog shaped… a key chain, a soft toy… But then, it struk me… OUR COLLEGE!!! Of course, our colg is shaped like a frog ("mendhak ka dil", indeed)!!! I put up the suggestion to the others, but one was in the mood to help me out!! They were enjoying this! Navy even tried to confuse me with her stupid ideas! But then Ank helped out by telling me to go to sleep & think abt it the next morning…
So the next day, we had to run to class..coz we were very late! So I had no time to think over the clue. But when the class ended, I found a gift in the college corridor!! Yay!! I was right!! But the next clue was missing…
As we went outside, Ritz again started sending something in… This time it was damn simple!!!!!!!

Clue#3: was the song, “tere sang, ek simple si coffee bhi…” This was something I could solve in my sleep! I picked up my activa & rushed off to AFJ…. The shop was closed, but there it was.. I could see two scrolls of paper wrapped in ribbons… :)….. Butt… these turned out to be blank sheets!!


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